I’m difficult to get along with. I’m not afraid to say what I think of you right then and there, no matter the appropriateness. A lot of bloggers dislike me, and that’s okay, because I’ve a distaste for people in general. The blogging community is comprised of mostly women[1. I’m 22. I suppose I should work up a habit of saying that no matter how weird it feels.], yet I surprisingly find myself befriending a small few of them anyway. I think I could blog without having friends and gaining connections, but where is the fun in that?
I’m probably not the best candidate you should come to for a shoulder to cry on, as crying totally isn’t my thing; offline it just makes me feel mega awkward. What am I supposed to say? What if I don’t say anything? Can I just nod? Can I just say, “mhm”? Am I supposed to pat them on the back and say, “there, there”? I don’t like it when people cry. I don’t know how to deal with that. I used to not cry much until recently[2. Past couple of years, starting at about 2006/2007. More so within 2011-present.]; I understand that getting it out there and just crying it out helps, but don’t cry on me. I’m sensitive, and I have emotions, but I am mentally unable to deal with that.
I won’t sugarcoat anything for you, so if I tell you you[3. No comma, ladies and gentlemen. Because no freaking comma is needed. The proper English language is failing before our eyes. D;] don’t want to hear it, listen. If you push, then yeah, I’ll tell you. I told my uncle M why I didn’t drive. His reaction was appalling. I understand that you’re fucking shocked and all, but please, just PLEASE, spare me the whole, “Why would you want to kill yourself?!” If I say something quietly, it’s for a freaking reason, dammit.
I’ll keep your secret(s) unless they can harm you or someone else. If you’ve murdered someone, and you confide in me, don’t promise me to not tell. Actually, don’t even tell me something like that. I don’t wish to be an accomplice.[4. Or whatever the word for knowing about a crime is.] I probably won’t tell you mine, though, as they’re typically dark and dreary.
I probably can’t hang out with you often. For one, my allergist said to try to stay as indoors as possible until June because of the pollen count, and two, I’m an introvert. Even going to the store is exhausting. Aside from those two interferences, I only really get a kick out of going to the movies and watching a new movie. I’m not the type of person who finds walking around random stores that interest me in the mall to find something cute, whether I’ve money or not. I’d much rather stay in and just play a board game, watch a movie, work a puzzle, sleep, make some recipe neither of us have ever tried before, do some DIY/craft thing, and/or just be alone.
I’m also probably a tad bit more difficult to please than you would think. I recently pushed away a guy I was really
in love with fond of[5. For a few years. Yes, I’m hurt. I prefer to not be all lovey-dovey, so no talking about this.] because I was so sick and tired of only being wanted when it was convenient for him. I don’t do that shit. I understand people get busy and whatnot, but I’m so not going to just wait around on someone. If you attempt to please me with money and/or another bribe of some sort, I definitely won’t be pleased. I’m not exactly materialistic; instead, I’m sentimental. Sure, my phone, my camera, my movies, my laptop and my iPod are all electronics and important to me, but just because I prefer to not let them go doesn’t mean I’m materialistic and/or spoiled. My iPod Nano was a birthday gift, I bought my own movies, I bought my ~$300 camera in 2008, and my laptop was purchased when I thought I was going to get back into school in the fall in 2011. I’m just not pleased over things others my age are, and I get so annoyed when people think that I am. And really, I’m not just talking about items. Words and actions count as well.
That is simply yours truly in a friend perspective in a nutshell. I’ve seen so much talk on Facebook, Twitter and blogs about how a friend “should” act. Just because a person doesn’t live up to the stereotype doesn’t make that person a horrible friend.